| She cries herself to sleep at night |
[Apr. 26th, 2006|01:23 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Evergreen Terrace | ] |
well i havent posted in over a year... myspace just sorta became my life there for awhile no im a little over it anyways i have no idea who still uses lj but anyways
Okay Mt Isa update... I have been here now for 6 maybe 7 months... and im liking it okay .... been feeling really emo the last few weeks but... i have started making some really good friends... friends that i can see myself being friends with for the rest of my life...maybe??
but i miss my old friends you know when you hear a song or look at photos and old memories flood back and you wish you could go back to that time but you know things will never ever be the same again ....
i want to go back to so many different ocasions and re live some of the fun times that me and my friends had back then....
although im starting to make new memories with my friends here and iam having some awesome times .... i feel like something is missing and i can't quiet think of what it is ...
I just quit my job and i have started getting in the routine of sleeping till 5pm staying awake till 6am just cause i hate facing each day .... i dont know why
but for the first time in my life... well for as long as i can remember I LOVE MY MUM ... and i havent said that in years .... she is always trying to do the right thing by me and i always manage to throw back in her face .... for some reason i cant show her how i feel becasue i have always shown so much hatered towards her....
i dont want to live here forever but i prolly will.... iam too scared to move back to the coast.... and as much as i miss so many ppl down there... if i move im going to miss ppl here too .... so now im really confused...
i can count my closest friends on one hand or make that a finger ....i think she knows who she is....
but feeling like you have no close friends to turn to in a time of crisis is the most upsetting thing to me... friends have always been my life cause i had no family near me on the gc... and no i have both but something still is making me unhappy... i guess i will find happiness one day.....
so to all my friends back home... thank you too the ones who have kept in touch with me this means so much
and to all my new friends thank you for giving me so many new memories and making it so much bearable for me to live here
love you all so much |
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| Everyone does one of these sooner or later |
[Apr. 19th, 2005|12:22 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | bored | ] |
| [ | music |
| | from first to last | ] |
[Height] about 5'8" i think
[Parents still together] no
[siblings] 1 brother - Glenn
[Pets] None that live with me... my brother has my cat
[In school/graduated] finished after yr 11
Favorites:
[Color] Red and black
[Number] 14
[Animal] horse
[Drinks] Vodka sunrise with pineapple juice
[Soda] sunkist
[Book] The Harry Potter books
Do you...
[Color your hair?] Yes...Black.
[Twirl your hair?] not that ive noticed
[Have tattoos?] yes... 3 .... um a horse, chinese symbol and scary miss mary
[Have Piercings?]yes... my lip
[Cheat on tests/homework?] yes always
[Drink/Smoke?] yes both trying to quit both
[Like roller coasters?] of course
[Wish you could live somewhere else?] Yes
[Want more piercings?] Maybe im pretty much over the piercing faze
[Like cleaning?] if im in the mood and i get rewarded
[Write in cursive or print?] print
[Sweat a lot?] sometimes if im hot or dancing too much
[Own a web cam?] No
[Know how to drive?] no
[Own a cell phone?] yes
[Ever get off the damn computer?] i dont use it much ....
Have you ever...
[Been in a fist fight?] yes but nothing too serious no blood was shed
[Kicked someone in the nuts?] cant remember so no
[Stolen anything?] yes .... and i feel horrible... but nothing major a few cds from friends etc
[Held a gun?] yes
[Drank?] yes
[Been so drunk you couldn't remember your name?) Yes .... i remember one time or lack of remember .... i dont even remember getting to the hospital so i guess i wouldnt have remembered my name
[Considered a life of crime?] i did once when i was stoned... we planned to rob the casino
[Considered being a hooker?] no
[Cheated on someone?] yes
[Cried over a girl?] um sorta
[Cried over a boy?] Yes.
[Lied to someone?] yes
[Been in love?] yes
[Fallen for your best friend?] yes
[Made out with JUST a friend?] yes
[Been rejected?] yes
[Been in lust?] yes
[Used someone?] yes
[Been used?] probably ive felt used a few times
[Been cheated on?] um not that ive found out about
[Been kissed?] yes
[Experimented with homosexuality?] yes
Currents...
[Current clothing] black millencolin hoody, and red boxers
[Current mood] bored
[Current taste] blackcurrent juice
[What you currently smell like] hair that has just been dyed
[Current hair] Black, shoulder lenght, messy and not brushed
[Current thing I ought to be doing] sleeping
[Current cds in stereo] from first to last
[Current job] subway andwich artist
The last time...
[Last book you read] Game over
[Last movie you saw] Dickie roberts
[Last thing you ate] cheese sandwich
[Last person you talked to on the phone] Matt (dont want to admit that )
do you...
[Do drugs?] yes sometimes
[Have a dream that keeps coming back?] yes sorta
[Play an instrument?] not well ... so no
[Believe there is life on other planets?] yes.... we cant be the only species this cmplicated there has too be something else out there
[Remember your first love?] Yes ... would rather forget
[Still love him/her?] In ways
[Read the newspaper?] when i can be bothered to buy it
[Have any gay or lesbian friends?] yes
[Believe in miracles?] yes
[Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?] yes
[Do well in school?] no
[Go to or plan to go to college] maybe but probably not
[Wear hats?] yes sometimes especially when im drunk i like to steal them off random boys
[Hate yourself?] some days
[Have an obsession?] yes .... music
[Have a secret crush?] Yes
[Collect anything?] not anymore
[Have a best friend?] um i have a few really close friends... but probably Cara.
[Like your handwriting?] Yes
[Care about looks?] yeah i suppose
Love life
[First crush] yeah a guy in year 3 his name was oliver ... he is now gay hahah what does that say about me
[Do you believe in love at first sight?] um not love lust maybe
[Have you ever played a game that required removal of clothing?] yes
[Are you a tease?] id say no but i heard i am
[Shy to make the first move?] yes when sober no when drunk
Are you a...
[Wuss] No
[Druggy] no
[Daydreamer] yes
[Freak] no
[Dork] maybe
[Bitch/Asshole] i guess i can be bitchy
[Brat] yes
[Sarcastic] yes
[Angel] no
[Devil] no
[Shy] yes
[Talkative] sometimes
[Flirty] sometimes |
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| A distant memory of you |
[Apr. 14th, 2005|11:34 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | lonely | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Name taken | ] |
Well anyways i was just re reading my LJ posts .... and ive realised so much shit..... i have had so many good times with so many great ppl andi always manage to fuck things up .... The high points of my post and the good memories i have of last year were....
Meeting stu and chels ... you guys are awesome got to make an effort to see you more.....
doing the following thing with Nessa....
* putting bubbles in the fountain
* Being library nerds
* checking our lj drunk one night just to see if any one had posted to out post
* the macho nacho night that didnt exsist
* That cider shit we used to drink and collecting the bottles (think that started with courts but continued with you)
* Air guitars on the dance floor we use to carve it up... we were so hot hahahah
* and of course stretching your ears definate highlight
I know i hurt you but im glad we are talking you gave me the best memeories ever i will always love you and i miss your friendship
i miss pokie days with Ryan and the members draw at the beer garden that was fun
I miss courtney, dale and james more than anything ... you guys were my life
dale falling aff a pole at the pinky was one of the funniest things i have ever seen
and my frist depot experience where i met the awesome kim and nadine ... who would have thought we lived the same lfes for so many years were in the same places at the same time knew the same ppl but just never managed to meet untill this fatefull night and if it wasnt for them i would have never met Nicole and abby .... thank you guys for the wonderful christmas .....
and of course meeting tash at tafe you are one my best friends ever get your ass out more
love all my friends and i miss you all heaps i promise to make more of an effort when i get back |
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| i still call the gold coast home |
[Apr. 13th, 2005|10:32 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  cheerful | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Thursday | ] |
well i have now been in mtisa for 1 week ... and i have enjoyed my stay here more then i thought i would so much so that iam going to stay a week or two longer and look for a job..... yep ive decided i want to move here for a little while anyway... if i dont find a job then im going to go back to the coast until my lease runs out and then move up here...... but yeah ..... im scared but excited.....
i will miss alot of ppl on the coast but not many... gc ppl are so fake so i will only miss a few....
im sure the party will always be there too.... as shit as ever but i will miss drunken nights filed with forgetful memoies.....and i will miss waking up on fridays/ sundays trying to piece together what i actually did the night before....
anyways enough from me |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 8th, 2005|11:52 pm] |
today i have decided that i hate msn it wouldnt let me sign in all day its fucked im stuck in shitville mt isa and now msn has fucked up ...... i want to come home....
my parents leave tomorrow so i will be home alone for a week |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 7th, 2005|08:20 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | bored | ] |
| [ | music |
| | my chemical romance | ] |
Im so bored......
I finially went to mt isa to visit my parents ive been putting this trip off for a very long time but i finially had enough of the gold coast mainly the party and decided to comw up hee and see them.....
its thursday night and i would normally be pre drinking around about now.... but im siting here on LJ and waiting for someone to come online and talk to me on msn .... but i doubt that will happen
the good and bad about mt isa...
GOOD
*I get to see my parents
* Good Food... miss my mums cooking so much
* not having to spend any money my parents are spoiling me
BAD
* No one to talk to
*Missing the party (even though that was one of the reasons i wanted to get away)
* Mt Isa doesnt not have the OC as there is no channel 10 here
* Not allowed to smoke as my parents still treat me like im 16
anyways my parents just got married which is why i came up because im house sitting for a week which means i will be even more bored and lonely but today they told me that they are going to pay for my new tattoo because i was saying how much i wanted it.... hmmm im not sure if the realise how much it costs... and im not sure which one i actually want to get hmmm |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 3rd, 2005|11:35 am] |
|
I tried posting the other day but it must not have worked.... well anyways i finially moved house.... i was quiet sad to leave my old house but its a new start ..... i spent two years in my last house which was filled with many drunken adventures, fights, fun, parties and street signs ( it was a mission to move those) ... those times will be missed so its goodbye to my old trash pad of a home.... and hello to our new older style homely home.... its quite nice ...its old and nannaish but i like it any way .... nothing much else has been happening... just working and the party drinking etc etc |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 22nd, 2004|04:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  tired | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Britney Spears | ] |
well i havent been on hetre in awhile so i thought i would update....basically have benn doing what i always do which is getting drunk then heading to the party..... but the highlights for my last few weeks. months are as followed
* I celebrated my 22nd birthday ... im getting old
* went to see End of fashion at the trocc
* Had a night off the party and went to the Cas for dinner thn to see SAW
* Went to see Govern the sky at the trocc last gig b4 it closed for the year .... so sad
that is basically all very exciting not as such |
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| Things that change you |
[Nov. 11th, 2004|02:41 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sick | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Norma Jean | ] |
everyone deserves to be happy and to find someone out of the millions of people in the world,To Love, To spend the rest of their lives with. A person that completes you in a way words can't describe. I thought I found that person. But like everything else in my life I lost it.. Finding and losing you. Is like the fish that got away you know there are plenty more out there but none will ever quite match up to .... The one that got away |
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| You wont forget me..... You will die.... |
[Nov. 10th, 2004|09:24 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  angry | ] |
| [ | music |
| | The Used | ] |
Well i havent posted on here for a long while and i dont even know why im bothering to post .... its not like anyone reads my lj any more.... maybe im posting cause i want to feel important and that maybe someone out there still cares about my fucked up weekend adventures.....
Lets see if i can remember back to where i last posted.....
its starts with THURSDAY it always starts with thursdays... Went to the party as usual but i really cant remember what shit went down so i will just leave it at that
FRIDAY
Stu and chels came up along with Ben and his GF cant remember her name i feel heaps bad but it was oh so long ago .... it was tasha birthday weekend so she graced us with her presence at the party ... she couldnt handle it so she left early.... nah her friend alarna doesnt like that place much... but im holding her to come out with me one thursday....
SATURDAY
well this is the start of our SECRET DEATH WEEKEND..... why we like this band so much is beyond me... but we do .... so we drank heaps then headed to the TROCC . ME, KIM, ABBY, NADINE, and THEA had so much fun taking random photos and doing what we do best getting drunk.....
SUNDAY
Well we got up early to meet THEA in surfers then ME, KIM, ABBY and NADINE got on a train and missioned it to Mary st to see yep you guess it ASD.... a fun day except we were locked in the venue for 7 hours .... me and kim escaped for a bit to get another jug
WEDNESDAY
headed yet again to Mary st with KIM, ABBY and THEA to see Govern the sky .... a good night the band was good .... enough said
Well THURSDAY came around quickly again and yes i headed to the party with the girls again ... so much fun was had by all
SATURDAY
was spent again getting drunk on pre drinks at KIMS yes it was fun yes the night was fun except for a small minor hiccup but we wont talk about that ....
SUNDAY
walked around surfers with ABBY and TASHA .... we decided to check out the party turned out to be a good night... free drinks cant go wrong
LAST OF ALL
i finially got caught ripping off centrelink... yes its true no i have a huge ass debt to pay oh well you get that shit sometimes |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 26th, 2004|04:53 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  confused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Senses Fail | ] |
Thursday night
headed to the party... drunk as ... went home for a bit then hitted the party again.. cruised round bymy self talked to dave... cant rememeber all that much....
friday
relived my youth and just hung in the streets of surfers with tash who is still 17 well actually she turn 18 today YAY HApPY BIRTHDAY TASHA
just showed her a glimpse of whats to come
Saturady.....
haeded to the party after an 8 shift at work and many shots of wipe out...
saw leigh... and peter havent seen those boys an a few weeks althought i didnt see them long as i wasnt al the party for most of the night |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 17th, 2004|06:28 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | hmmm The used | ] |
well havent been on for awhile so its shall be a long post ..... this is what i have been up to
Friday
went to see Kisschasy and Something with numbers at the Trocc with stu and Chels... Fun Fun.... Chatted to Kyle bout lots of Random shit... and how Blink 182 start many trends......
Saturday
Went to The party with Kim and Abby and the rest of the crew... saw all the usual people out.... nothing really stands out from the night it was way too long ago to remember
Worked pretty much all week .... loving my new job ......
This Thursday
went to the party ...l didnt think i was that drunk but reports are that i was in fact very drunk.... hmmmm you get that.....fell over on the dance floor... and i stole some boys hat .. hahaha
Friday
i didnt go out ....
i lie i walked in to get Kims Used cd off the DJ stayed for 5minutes
Saturday
Went to the Trocc to see Govern the Sky......
Then headed to the party... where i drank more and got really fucked up....
Walked home with Chris and chatted until the Sun came up....
Nic Thanks for talking to me on the phone when i was bored .... hope you had a good weekend.....
and now its sunday and i just finished work and i havent slept from last night yet..... so im feeling very tired and im going to sleep now.....
.....Good Night..... |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 8th, 2004|12:57 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  hot | ] |
| [ | music |
| | my chemical romance | ] |
hmmmm okay went to the party last night.... got way way too drunk as usual
drank a whole bottle of red wine before i went out then drank beer when i got out.....
note to self not a good mix
think i had fun .... didnt dance much ..... just stumbled around chatting....
sorry to everyone i annoyed
really cant be botherted typing today im waiting for my photos... these should be good
its way too hot today |
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| well |
[Oct. 6th, 2004|02:29 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | bitchy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | My Chemical Romance | ] |
the rest of my weekend was pretty good .... friday cruised into the party with Leigh where we met up with stu and chels... visited kim at work and got subway cookies.....
saturday went to the trocc and saw a secret death....me kim and nadine all brought shirts so we looked like tools wearing them at the party
sunday worked then went to the trocc again... to see a secret death, pheonix down and devolved... nothing much else exciting happened
a went to a couple of gigs last weekend and i just wanna know what happened to the atmosphere... if your not standing there with your arms folded you are a fuckhead..... and dont fit in.....
Just because you go out with the guys in the band doesn't make you any better the then girls in the crowd... but these girls think they are superior because they have connections...The smart ass comments they throw arond just because there boyfriend is in a band are bullshit.... if these girls werent so insecure about their boyfriends cheating on them they probably wouldnt be such bitches
What ever happened to colourful braclets, colourful stripy socks and juciy root shirts everywhere you turn everyone is wearing black and if your not your not "hardcore"
Now dont even get me started on AA gigs.. is it cool to sit on the floor these days for god sakes get up and support the band...
seeing 16yr olds with sXe crosses on my hands made me laugh this is a great example of following the trend....
Of course they are sXe for now they arent old enough to drink...
well thats just how i saw the weekend maybe all gigs arent like this |
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| hmmmm |
[Oct. 1st, 2004|05:48 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Alexisonfire | ] |
anyways im sorta over the whole LJ thing but im posting anyways.... had a very good weekend last weekend too far away to remember what actually happened but it was good.... all though i found out some bad news it turned into be one of the best weekends i have had in way too long i think it was the fact that i got my first pay so i was fully cashed up.....didnt last long though....
this weekend has been pretty un eventful just working and hanging with kim and crew .....
had so much fun last night which was thursday .... went to kim for pre drink with dale... Leigh ventured over later was pretty good..... kim lost her wallet and we searched the whole house looking for it it turned up in her back pocket.......
got to the party and pretty much hung out with Leigh.. until peter got there .....got drunkas always and had fun dancing with the girls.... came home at 4 and me leigh peter and Abby decided to go swimming in my pool it was cold
tonight im staying home heaps strange for me but im a little sick
brought the new alexis cd today.. plus story of the year good good |
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| I got a job |
[Sep. 21st, 2004|01:33 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sick | ] |
yay well i finially got a job... I am now a sandwich artist yeah thats right im working at Subway cavill avenue.....
i started last night and i was heaps of fun.... this might stop me from going out... just a bit
anyways the weekend that was .....
Thursday
went out with Beck , Kim, abby and Nadine... To the Party .... Left relatively early.....
Friday
Went out By my self to meet Tina.... they went to the trocc.... i got caught up in tweed heads so missed the band i wanted to see....
Saturday
went to the Party with Beck .... not a good night but had fun dancing up a storm .....
im really sick at the moment and sunburnt so im not feeling to good |
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| Your Dreams will slowly die |
[Sep. 14th, 2004|12:17 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Through Closed eyes | ] |
i wrote this awhile back but i feel like shit and its bringing me really down ...
dont get me wrong i treasure all my friends the happy memories and the things i have done, but i feel like i have wasted so much time and i havent achieved have as much as i thought i would have by now because of things that have happened in the past i fell i have not grown up in a normal way, I still act dress and think like iam 18 ... I have no concept on how a 22yr person should act and iam not sure anyone can tell me that either
I look at some people younger than me and think how together their lives are and how mature they are ... iam still thinking like " what am I going to do when i finish school" when i actually finished 5years ago, It still seems like yesterday, I have no direction and i have no idea what directon i want to take
Iam so depressed right now there are so many things that i want but so many i cant have or cant achieve, so many things that make me happy yet iam not happy living this exsistance, i have missed out on so much that i cant go back and change the things i want
iam almost 22years old living the same thing day in day out but cant find away to change it and make my life what i should... I wish i could go back to being 19years old a time where i was happy and i didnt have a worry in the world and my life was heading in the direction i wanted it to ....But so many things happened back then and i have wasted three years that i cant get back
I wonder what i would be doing if i hadnt gotten on the bus that day and meet Beck would have i moved to surfers
would i still be tight with my school frends
would i know half the people i do now
if i hadnt been saved by the person that i loved
would i be in Mt isa now
would my relationship with my parents be better
If the party didnt have $1 $2 drinks
would i still be a job that i loved
or would i still be here living the exact same thing i wonder if one small thing had have been different would i still be living this unhappy life or would i be happy |
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| LJ is shitting me today |
[Sep. 14th, 2004|10:48 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Reel Big fish - Cheer Up | ] |
well well well what a shit weekend to be had.
Thursday was shit went to the party with Beck and Tina got too drunk and came home at 12.30 to meet my friend that was ok i suppose...
Woke on friday and went to the Beach with Peter, Beck and Tina ... beck and Tina found Romeo and Juliet they were Jelly fish...
Friday Night went to the party meet up with stu and chels and friends... came home early again while Beck and Tina stayed out...
Saturday went and watched Tina Abby and Kim jam .. it was fun they had me in laughter trying to chose a band name ....
Saturday night was suppose to be good was it .... NO ... went to the party with Kim Abby NAdine and Nicole....
and cried like a fucker... Thanks Ben, Micheal and Leigh for cheering me up .... it sorta worked but what made me laugh was the fag with the mowhawk giving me and Ben a tissue and saying i hate you emo kids... am i emo.....
anyways today i had a job interview at subway in surfers which means if i get it i will be working with Kim and abby that should be good ...and means i wont have to go to Mt Isa in 2 weeks like i had planned |
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kristical's journal
